Thursday, July 8, 2010

What is Love?

As you know there are many types of love. In my quest to find out about love, I sought the help from Wikkopedia, our online encyclopedia and learned some new terms.   Unrequited love refers to those feelings of love that are not reciprocated. Interpersonal love is most closely associated with interpersonal relationships. Such love might exist between family members, friends, and couples.
Love should not be confused with Lust, which  is the initial passionate sexual desire that promotes mating, and involves the increased release of chemicals such as testosterone and estrogen. These effects rarely last more than a few weeks or months.  Lust is a momentary itch, whereas Love never lets you go. Attraction is the more individualized and romantic desire for a specific candidate for mating, which develops out of lust as commitment to an individual mate forms. Recent studies in neuroscience have indicated that as people fall in love, the brain consistently releases a certain set of chemicals, including pheromones, dopamine, norepinephrine, and serotonin, which act in a manner similar to amphetamines, stimulating the brain’s pleasure center and leading to side effects such as increased heart rate, loss of appetite and sleep, and an intense feeling of excitement. Research has indicated that this stage generally lasts from one and a half to three years.
Since the lust and attraction stages are both considered temporary, a third stage is needed to account for long-term relationships. Attachment is the bonding that promotes relationships lasting for many years and even decades. The (love) Attachment is generally based on commitments such as marriage and children, or on mutual friendship based on things like shared interests. It has been linked to higher levels of the chemicals oxytocin and vasopressin to a greater degree than short-term relationships.
“Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, and always perseveres.” (1 Cor. 13:4–7, The Bible – NIV) (Excellent book– I highly recommend it.)
There is the internal (self-love) component that for some reason determines or limits the amount of love that you are willing to accept from others (external). According to some you can only accept love on a level that you are willing and able to extend to yourself.
I have always thought that the true measure of love is the degree someone is willing to put their wishes and desires to the side in favour of the one they love.  When  your heart flows in love, you naturally feel happier. In the (very good) book, Happy for No Reason, by Marci Shimoff, she states, "You can start your heart's flow by sending lovingkindness to anyone and everyone you see.  It does not have to be dramatic."  Something as simple as wishing others well generates love in the heart.  You begin by creating a strong current of love and happiness because a heart overflowing in love is continually being filled with more love.  Choosing to feel love and think positively cultivates more happiness and love in your life. Love is the master key that opens the gates of happiness. 
So, is Love floating on air? butterflies in your stomach? riding on cloud nine? a bouquet of flowers?  
Love is...

Love is not a look or
Something felt at first sight.
Love is not a kiss
Or a hug so tight.
Love is not a word 
Romancing the moon
Or something absurd.
Love is a series of 
Memories shared
Someone to do for
Someone that cares.
Love is the compatibility
Of two through
the good and the bad.
Someone to laugh with and
Someone that wipes 
The tears when you are sad
Love is YOU!

Written by Yolanda Pacheco Garcia from
Lost and Found : LOVE, a book of Love Poems
Purchase your copy at: